Aww Sans don't cry...I know that you're blaming yourself a lot but i'm sure that Paps would never hate you even if you done bad things, he would always forgive you! (You're allowed to correct me that i'm lying I understand)
Hello sans, I'm Rosy. I understand your struggle...honest, I used to be in the situation myself actually. Though avoiding it will only make it worse for you. It'll hurt at first but...as you continue too speak your mind about it, the pain will fade soon enough. You won't feel so stressed and pressured about anything towards him. Despite everything, I doubt he won't see you any less of a brother...please tell me if I'm wrong. If needed, you can/may talk to me privately or discard all that I've said.